Looking at the cattails in the back yard bordering our pond, I see red wing blackbirds swinging back and forth on top of those tallest spires. Little sparrows, robins and wrens are among them. They're all hard little workers, flying back and forth, building their nests, walking in the grassy areas of the backyard finding worms or insects to eat. They live off the land and each day they must keep working to stay alive. These little guys have never had the opportunity to collect extra food or take a break. No sir, each day they must do it all over again! Staying alive is work!
Amazingly with all that pressure they still find time to build nests . . . only to find them occasionally flooded by heavy rainstorms that raise the level of the pond. And yet family'sare created, food is found and it all seems to work.
We, on the other hand, do not need to work every day to stay alive. We have the ability to RETIRE, maintaining ourselves quite nicely for years without ever "having to work". Of course this is because we saved during the time we were gainfully employed. There must be a way to help those little birdies out! What if birds could be changed to be more like people???
They're doing some mighty interesting things with stem cells and bioengineering. Seems it's all happening so fast. Let's just suppose that birds could be"modified" to be more "like people". If you ask a "bio-engineer" he'll tell you "anything is possible". OK!, what might be the consequence if birds were bioengineered to be more like people? Well, the good part is that they could, like us, save during their "productive years" and retire". They could have a long and satisfying life. . . So how would that change MY view of the pond?
Let's assume the bioengineering of birds has taken place. Now lets step into that strange world! How do they make a living, how does the change affect the environment? What are the consequences?
As new productive members of society they must now work, save and invest so they too can some day retire. What kind of work are they doing??? Well, since birds spent most of their previous lives singing, many of them now "Sing professionally for a living". Some super successful birds have become exceedingly wealthy! Thousands of birds around the world have become famous. Many have taken names of "our popular artists".
It was "interesting" and unique in the early years seeing the birds change their lives to the better! Ornithologists and Environmentalists were ecstatic with the results! The REAL problem came years later. Now that birds have their own personal medicare, medicaid and social security, the bird population of the world has expanded to an absolute unreasonableand totally unacceptable level! For the birds "It's Great!" For the rest of us "It's a total nightmare"!!!!!
For example, we now have a "Jerry Lee Lewis" bird in our own backyard! "Bird Jerry Lee's" nest is over 50 feet high so forget about seeing the pond. Oh!, and Sleep? Before birds made the dramatic change I used to leave the windows open, listen to soft chirping sounds and be lulled to sleep. Not any more! No sir! Not with "Birdie Jerry Lee" and his 60,000 member fan club in my backyard. He performs nightly! Some of his performances are downright dangerous! I mean burning his piano? Who knew birds could do that? And the audience reaction?? They think its FUN!!! Last week "Birdie Jerry Lee" performed an all nighter in the back yard with "Birdie Chuck Berry". Over 75,000 fat little birdies in attendance wanting to witness the friction between Jerry and Chuck! What a Mess!!!
So now a solution is presented by a Renowned Scientist! (In my mind this guy is questionable (AT BEST))!!! HE can't even control his own personally invented artificial right arm. . . . DOES HE SEEM CREDIBLE TO YOU??? His answer is just blow up the world and start over"!!! "The Nuclear Option!"
This Scientist proposes that a "computer selected" subset of the population, begin anew, deep in mine shafts prior to the annihilation of mankind. Sometime in the distant (safe) future they would emerge to start civilization over . . thus . . insuring the survival of the human race! How Nice!!!
Let's join the discussion as this crazy bastard discusses the process! Does it seem to you that the military and politicians present become more interested as the strategy unfolds??? Oh . . . incidentally . . . I think I could have built an artificial arm that works better than his!!!)
Till Next Week