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Turntable 04/28/2014

4/28/2014

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ATTENTION:   WANTED!!!  

MAXWELL EDISON!  Armed and dangerous!  His weapon of choice  -  A Silver hammer! Max has been seen hanging out with his 3 accomplices, all of whom are guilty of various robberies and theft, in the Seattle "academic" area.  Man - Just when you think you want to visit Seattle and now you got this nut job loose on the streets hammering people on the head with his little silver hammer!

Police chief:  "Although all in this group of villains are guilty of various offenses it is Maxwell that we are most concerned with.  Max may be a medical student but we are not sure at this time.  He has learned to disguise himself so well that it is difficult to spot him. Professors are a favorite target of this villain." You might find Max sitting in the front row in any of your classes.  Wide,  empty,  beady eyes staring up at you with a slight smile on his face appearing to know something you don't!  Kind of curls your toes doesn't it Westy.  "Max was captured in a previous arrest and brought to trial. Then, in the midst of the courtroom activity, Max's "fan club" of young girls loudly profess his innocence . . . in the disruption and confusion that follows, Max amazingly kills the judge and escapes.  If you recognize any of the villains in the following video please report it immediately to the local Seattle police!  Listen carefully to the trail of murders he is professed to have committed. 
Detained!!!  They just captured and detained one of the felons.  He's in custody and being interrogated.  He's ratting out MAX for a reduced sentence and my God!, what a comprehensive description!!!  The authorities must be ecstatic over the massive amount of descriptive information gathered.   With this lucky break, location and capture seem certain. Here's a video of his unorthodox deposition!
THEY CAPTURED MAX!  (really? on that description??) . . Authorities say it was definitely the detainees deposition that helped locate and capture Max.  Authorities indicate the following pieces of descriptive information were critical in the positive identification process. .  Having "feet below his knees" "joo joo eyeballs" and "monkey finger" were most important  in the identification process.  

Captured, but what's the difference?  Nobody gets punished these days. Too many ways torehabilitate the misguided or mismanaged elements of society.  If they want help all they have to do is ask!

So Max asked!  Pleading that he couldn't help himself.  He said he was an orphan as a child, had been homeless for the past 10 years, and had recently lost his bus pass!  Listen as Max pleads for help!
SENTENCING - Needless to say, this time they took maximum security into consideration during his arraignment and trial. Convicted!  No execution but Max, at 21, is sentenced to 43 years in prison.  So he will be gone a long time . . .  a really long time!  As they took him out of the courtroom in handcuffs he was heard saying to his wife!  "Honey, I'll be gone a long time and I'd like to ask" 
Overheard public conversation
Soooo . .  think this guy will get visitation rights?  Well, I don't know but - Hey! do you think there are any other nut jobs in the Seattle area?  Well there might be a prof or two!  You know those guys are a bit daf . . . 

Till Next Week

Harv
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